just got home from training. i'm exhausted yet i love the feeling and the fact that i'm losing weight. haha. you know what, i just happen to realize how cheezy i was on my last post. i mean man i'm still young and a lot more opportunities and good people are gonna be coming my way. life is really like this. shit happens but it doesn't mean the end of the world yet. well those cheezy moments were basically just part of the stimulus and response process. it's like when you get pinched your instinct would definitely dictate to you that you were hurt through the presence of pain. everything happens for a reason and i think that whatever this is for, it'll surely satisfy everything i've been through. i'm not rushing though. i'm enjoying my life right now. i breathe, i think, therefore i exist. nonetheless, i am happy. GOODNIGHT LOVES!(:

moving on. i recently experienced heart break. despite the happy mood i used to show for the past few days, i must admit my heart is not at ease. i've been with a guy for more than 3 years. we used to call each other babe. to me, he was everything. the reason why i look forward to waking up every morning and why i smile before i sleep at night. basically, i treasured him like he was the reason for my existence. we shared laughter and tears. we've been through thick and thin. all i ever thought was "he is the one i wanna share the rest of my life with. "and i felt that he wanted the same thing too through his words and actions. our relationship seemed almost perfect. problems do arise but we'd always surpass them. yet one day something went wrong. we were together before that day. we're good. we even ate out after class. he wanted twister fries so we ate at mcdo. while on our way home, we watched transformers 2 on his psp. he even placed his head on my shoulder while we were watching.nothing felt wrong til the next day. he still texted me the morning of that day that he's heading for school already.after a while,he stopped texting. not even a single one after that day. i took it like he's just busy on school works since he's having his duty already. i even told him i trust him that it's not his way of letting go.i kept texting without expecting for a reply. that's how i loved him. a week later i checked out his fs account, it surprised me when i saw a picture of him with a girl as his primary pic what's worse is that they both used the same prima. his shoutout was "happy". given the benefit of the doubt, i took it like she was just his friend but judging through the girl's comments, i knew there was something going on between them. well, initial reaction, i definitely cried. i've never felt deeply hurt ever til that day. i know that i really didn't have the right to his life cause we weren't committed that moment. a thing came up basically a month before that but the thing is he showed interest through his actions. i interpreted it like he still loves me. well who wouldn't right? when a guy hugs, kisses, and hold your hands who woudn't expect it to be that the guy is still in love with you? i'm the type of person you can easily open up with. i'd understand it if he talked to me about it directly not that he left me hanging and surprised me after a week. i could've understand it better if he opened up. well, i have nothing against the girl cause she didn't know obviously. we don't even know each other so there's no reason for me to invest grudge on her neither am i angry with the guy i used to love. I WOULDN'T WANT HIM TO STAY IF HE ISN'T HAPPY WITH ME ANYMORE.I'D RATHER SEE HIM HAPPY WITH ANOTHER PERSON OTHERWISE. well, that's how i love him. the pain of letting him be with another person is incredibly unbearable yet who am i to ask him to stay. i'm the past, she is the present. all i can do is pray for their happiness but the moment he'd be hurt, its gonna be another issue. i wouldn't hold back on that.

seeing you happy means absolutely everything to me.

this too shall pass.

whew! i'm back! it's been like ages since i last posted something. i'm fortunate that i got home early today plus i'm not burdened with any homework nor am i to beat any deadline so i'm gonna be writing to the extent given the benefit also that i'm blogging through my own laptop and there's no more reason that anyone might be attempting to bother. okay, so much for the intro. well, classes have been on since june 15 as far as i remember and i'm gonna proudly say that the first month of my college life has molded me into a better person already. i'm not bragging or anything, i'm just happy for my achievements so far. i was given the privilege to become the president of our classroom. thanks to my blockmates. haha. i'm not gonna say that it's hard but its somehow quite like that yet i'm enjoying taking responsibilities and helping my other blockmates. i joined the varsity also. volleyball obviously. we train 3 days a week from 5 to 8 pm sometimes we go beyond 8. as a result i loss weight! haha! its been a while since i last felt the enjoyment of going to school. i'm thankful that college life has offered me the same feeling again. i don't wanna compare highschool to college life but if i'm gonna be asked to do so, i'd definitely say that college is relatively enjoyable than highschool.maybe because it's when you meet you're true companions.the people that would stick with you through thick and thin.don't get me wrong here,i love my hs friends also.its just that we don't get to be with each other often anymore.too bad.i miss you kupals!:D